Resident Spotlight: Quay

“You are not your mistakes. If you mess up, ask for help…”

What was life like before coming to Marian House? Quay entered in September 2022.

In my case, it depends on where the story begins. There’s a bizarre and confusing mix of awesomeness and tragedy. My journey to Marian House started around the same time COVID plagued the world. I’d recently moved to Baltimore. I lived by the harbor; thought Thad the career of my dreams, and literally 3 bad decisions later, I was in rehab by the end of that year, facing eviction, addiction, and I was quickly spiraling into deep despair.

What led you to Marian House?

Three years after COVID, after my struggles with substance abuse started, I experienced being homeless in Iowa, trapped in a relationship with an ex-convict and life-long criminal. I recently lost the baby I had with that guy. I hated my job at a local grocery. My grandfather had died 2 days before my 34th birthday. And yeah, I was still struggling with my addiction. I was using in the bathroom of my job and dropping weight like water. I ended up having a moment where I decided I was going to give up, that my addiction was unbeatable. I spent an entire week running the streets of Baltimore. During that week I experienced where my addiction was going to lead me to (in the worst ways), and on that 5th day, a couple I was using with walked me to treatment, and that’s where this journey began.

How would you describe Marian House to someone else?

Marian House is a safe haven for women and families, where you will be loved and encourages until you learn to love and encourage yourself. Marian House is a place where you can shed your traumas, your pain and recover from whatever circumstance led you here. At Marian House, anyone can grow, become educated, and learn healthy life skills that will directly help you become the best version of yourself. Marian House is the only place they anyone should go if they really want a better life, as it is unlike any other rehabilitation center in the city. Marian House will teach you how to manage your money, everyday work/life balance skills, relationships, emotions, and your schedule. You cannot leave this place without learning to be a productive human, PERIOD.

What has been the most helpful to you at Marian House?

It would hands down have to be the fact that most of the staff are female and each and every one of them love and respect the women that come through the doors. They don’t see you as your mistakes and every staff member pulls out the very best in you. I really take a lot from my therapy sessions with Ms. Beth who is the most phenomenal woman. She has this crazy ability to pull things out of me I try to hide. I really couldn’t imagine my growth without my counselor, Ms. Beth.

What’s something you learned here that you will take with you?

I learned that it’s okay to ask for help and needing others doesn’t make me weak. I learned that trauma isn’t always physical and emotional scars do in fact shape you in ways that may not be so easily detectable but are still equally as important to address.

When people support Marian House, what are they supporting?

They are helping women have a safe place to go each night. They are supporting educational dreams and aspirations. They are helping women find and keep careers. They are helping clothe, feed, educate, and mold women to become better citizens and better parents. They are helping women realize their potential by taking away, just for a while, the stress of dealing with a life full of the challenges that hold them back.

 

If you could talk to your younger self (5 or 10 years ago), what would you tell them?

You are not your mistakes. If you mess up, ask for help, dust yourself off, and start over. You can trust people and you can accomplish anything you want with a plan and action.